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🔍 how do i set my emotional out-of-office replies

United Kingdom West Kazakhstan

SUV with a "baby on board" sticker call that meals on wheels

Content warning: gay thoughts

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the hellhound urge to partake in incredibly reckless shenanigans that ultimately result in an explosion which launches me through the door to my workshop and into my bedroom, startling my partner/friend as i land right next to them, covered in soot, several patches of fur still aflame, with the most devious grin on my face

Content warning: gay

@Slime, Goo, etc :qvp:

oooooh you wanna adopt me so badly i have no aggression issues and i won't eat your furniture oooohh

Content warning: wario-adjacent

just misparsed "librarian" as an intentional corruption of "liberal". i think that's one of the primary symptoms of grass fondling deficiency syndrome

Friendica is a good social media platform because whenever you make a post or get interactions, the whole frontend locks up for several minutes. Can't get addicted to scrolling if you can't even access the site 8-)

Edit: In an ironic twist of fate, my Friendica server actually stopped lagging the moment I posted this.

Content warning: furry porn

lewd nano reshared this.

in reply to lewd nano

Pup Keith DX Director's Cut
Pup Keith DX Director's Cut  
  • Content warning: furry porn
  • Filtered word: nsfw

@lewd nano

normal partners raise children together. i, on the other hand, raise Linux servers. 8-)

aww, qemu-vm-3621's handling their first request! they grow up so fast :')

oh boy, time to daydream about hot punk guys again

Content warning: gay

sign that reads "will run anarchist server infrastructure for anal"

reshared this

in reply to Pup Keith DX Director's Cut

Pup Keith DX Director's Cut
Pup Keith DX Director's Cut  
actually if you give me food, housing, Internet access, and gay sex, you can get me to do quite a lot of things for you

I am once again asking for punk guys to adopt me as their pet (I give good blowjobs and I know how to run Linux servers)

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Content warning: gay

real "big hellhound puppy" hours rn

Classic Mac OS having a "resize to fit" button instead of "maximize" was a criminally underutilized innovation. stop making shit take up my whole screen
Unknown parent

Pup Keith DX Director's Cut
Pup Keith DX Director's Cut  
@‏ yeah, I know, but it's not very discoverable anymore. half of the appeal imo is that it essentially is the maximize command in Classic Mac OS, it's just a smart version that doesn't forcibly fill the monitor with blank window area. having the default, most easily accessible option be "please waste all my monitor space :)" defeats the purpose
@ZIMA! 🔪

i get one (1) quote reshare and my instance is instantly brought to its fucking knees :tearsofjoy:

Hold on... there's more RAM in the fucking PineBuds than the PineTime. what the fuck

PineBuds Pro - open firmware capable ANC wireless earbuds - PINE STORE

**********************  Disclaimer *********************** For more PineBuds Pro info, please visit wiki page at https://wiki.pine64.org/wiki/PineBuds_Pro Dismantling the earbuds can negatively affect performance, especially ANC functionality.
PINE Store

Iska reshared this.

this user is full of malice

the canine urge to introduce invasive species of twitter discourse into the linkedin meme ecosystem, making the site uninhabitable for decades

full of thoughts about mens' warm, heavy, throbbing balls

the innate psychological need to nuzzle and fondle a punk guy's balls

thinking about guys with heavy, musky balls <3

the homosexual urge to cause an international diplomatic incident

daydreaming about getting my prostate turned into jelly by a group of rough, rowdy punk dudes? it's more likely than you think
in reply to Pup Keith DX Director's Cut

Pup Keith DX Director's Cut
Pup Keith DX Director's Cut  
oh to be groped and stripped in the mosh pit, then pinned against a wall and fucked aggressively by several men

Yeah romance is cool but have you ever been in an owner/pet relationship

hnng colonel im trying to sneak around but the smell of my alpha's cum keeps alerting the guards

puppy time :3

BARKABRKABRKRABKVARKBANRKKRBAKRBAKRVABARKBARKBARK

Need to rest my head in a hot punk's lap and sniff his bulge

me when im in an ableism competition and my opponent is a social media keyboard warrior
in reply to Pup Keith DX Director's Cut

Pup Keith DX Director's Cut
Pup Keith DX Director's Cut  
funny how the people with the literal worst opinions and generally terrible treatment of their fellow beings are also the loudest about it

hellhounds on their way to tear apart the fabric of reality in order to get punished by their master for being a naughty pup

(it's me i'm hellhounds)

I have two sides:

  • malevolent demonic entity with power beyond mortal comprehension, ancient unspeakable evils coursing through my veins
  • BIG puppy :3

the innate emotional desire to snuggle up on top of someone and crush them underneath your body

HHGreggnant

*cocks gun* time for shooties ^w^

the canine urge to roll around on the floor and bite people's ankles
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